I was told recently that I had lost my joy. It was said in a kind and gentle way and I appreciated the comment. As I thought about it in the days that followed, I realized that it was true. My joy light had dimmed.
2019 and 2020 held heaviness for me: Saying goodbye to my father and dog, Sophie. Seeing my job shift in ways that weren’t ideal for me, leading to my decision to retire and move on. Anxiety surrounding the pandemic and caring for my elderly mother. Lots of ‘stuff’ with a fair amount of grief to process. I realized that my joy was diminished and I needed to re-kindle that light.
It’s funny that once a thought gets into your head, you start noticing it show up more. I noticed the words “find joy” in random places. I received a gift box from a friend that was called “Tokens of Joy”. There was a card that said, “I choose to be happy and joyful. I feel JOYFUL.”
I also kept seeing references in various places about picking a word for the year. An intention, if you will. So, I decided to pick a word and, of course, the word was “joy”. I have been learning to zentangle (if you don’t know what it is, google it!) so I thought I might do a zentangle with the word, joy.
Yesterday morning, as I was driving to yoga, my head was spinning about something that I was annoyed about. You know how that goes … obsessively reviewing the evidence proving my case of why I was right to be annoyed. Blah blah blah. I stopped at a red light and happened to glance to my left and up the hill where I see (I kid you not) HUGE letters on a lawn that spelled out J-O-Y! I drive this way a lot and this was the first time I noticed it. I just sat there laughing. Ok, universe. I hear you. Snapped me right back to the present.
In the afternoon, I created this tile with my word for 2021. It is now hanging where I can see it every day. I hope that 2021 is filled with joy for me, for you and for the world.
With gratitude to Tangled Yogi for her amazing instructional video!